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Beer bottle stickers and hippo backsides - Uganda
by Peter Baldwin | Date >
2005-11-29 | Country : Uganda | City : Murchison
| Area : Murchison Falls |
There is a place in Uganda where the world of work, commuting and offices could not be further away. It is called Murchison Falls; oddly enough in Murchison Falls National Park. About a six hour drive from Kampala (the capital of Uganda), the route takes you from the congestion of the capital, through arable land and forest; ultimately finishing in the wilds of the park. There is so much to do in Murchison that I believe you need at least a week there to make the most of it. Admittedly, my friend and I travel there mainly for the fishing and socialising which is excellent, but there are many more things to see and do.
We were last there in April of this year and had some of the best Nile Perch fishing of our lives. Staying at Red Chilli Rest Camp, we were ideally placed to travel both to the delta and also the falls themselves. But what we were best placed of all to accomplish, was excessive drinking in the bar there. We met the local staff (Nixon and Edward) and they were about as welcoming as you could be. By the first night, we were in charge of music (apologies if any other guests are reading this), chatting to like-minded idiots and generally having a good time. On the last note, it is important that when staying at Red Chilli, you keep up the traditions of the place and mingle. It’s not compulsory of course and no one will think any less of you if you do not, but you get so much more from the trip if you take the time to share a beer or some tea with others.
Most mornings we were up early with sore heads and driving the 35 minutes to the falls to watch the sun rise over the hills before attempting the treacherous climb down. Once safe, we descended into the Devil's Cauldron below the falls and fished until the sun was too high in the sky to allow us to remain comfortable. After a spot of lunch in the shade, we either remained to fish the evening or went back to the camp and prepared for a late afternoon game drive. As regards the game; it is plentiful with lion, elephant, antelope, giraffe and warthog etc. We were even lucky enough to see a leopard on our first drive that visit. Typically you would take a game guard but if like us, you visit Africa regularly and know the bush, it is more than safe to go in your own vehicle without assistance; provided you observe the obvious rules when surrounded by wild animals. The general form for the evening is to either eat the perfectly reasonable food on offer at Red Chilli, or get a group together and use the braai (BBQ) facilities. Either is great and a fantastic night's fun always follows, with the hardcore element remaining up until the early hours.
Having mentioned the basic precautions to be observed when around wild animals, it is now that I must mention what can become of a reasonably educated 27 year old, if left in the bush for too long. There is an unwritten bet in Uganda that says you cannot pin a beer bottle sticker on the arse of a hippo. There are a number of reasons but chief amongst them being that it would be damn stupid to try; given that hippos kill more humans than any other beast that lives in mama Afrika. Having consumed the best part of 10 bottles of Bell lager and a few Jack Daniels and coke one night, I decided outright that this could and furthermore, should be done. So having used the condensation on the bottle to remove the Bell sticker with ease, I duly headed into the darkness that surrounded the bandas where we slept, in search of said quarry. Luckily for me, on all three attempts (on three separate nights) Nixon, the camp assistant, was there to walk me safely back to the bar, claiming for my benefit that I need a couple of free beers before attempting such a feat. I fell for this without protest and he also gathered in my friend who was loyally stalking behind me, with camera and flash in hand.
Granted this was stupid and granted I still believe it can be done using what I call ‘the two-banda technique’ (like minded fools can email me for full diagrams and thought processes), but it serves to demonstrate that all manner of fun can be had in this wonderful place. I do not advocate attempting the bet, it is stupid and idiotic but that aside; for the reasonably sensible traveller, it is a fantastic place. Red Chilli is a place that is what you make it. It can be a quiet place to use as a base or the centre of the holiday where young and old gather to drink, sing and moreover, admire the natural flora and fauna. You can catch Nile Perch to 130kg, photograph lion and leopard, trek to see chimps, take a boat trip to the Falls or just walk and view the amazing people and wildlife.
If you ever find yourself in Uganda, you absolutely must; have a night at Bubbles in Kampala and spend some time at Murchison National Park. There are a million and one other things to do, so look into everything but make sure you check out the Bell lager, the Falls and the Red Chilli Rest Camp.
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